I'm Not Moving

I posted this on facebook yesterday:  "Our family is growing by two feet!"  With the following picture:

 

That's right!  Baby #3 is on the way!  We wanted to wait and share this great news until after our first ultrasound.  After experiencing what we did with Carina, even though the chances of Achondrogenesis happening again are so slim, we were a bit hesitant to share about this pregnancy too early.  

At our ultrasound yesterday my OB spoke with our wonderful ultrasound doctor and she told him she'd like to do some extra blood work on me as well as see me for an early ultrasound in the next week.  The baby was bouncing all over the place and it had a very strong heartbeat!  The doctor did a preliminary measurement of the baby and it looks right on track.  We got some really cool pictures and it was amazing to hear the heartbeat and see this little life spinning and dancing inside me.  

I am currently 12 weeks along, already in the second trimester--yeah!!  The baby is due in January!  And, according to the Chinese calendar, JUST makes the cutoff for a "Dragon Baby!"  Babies born in the year of the Dragon are considered the most favored, the most honored.  I feel favored and honored just to HAVE this little bundle!!  I was SO happy when we found out about this baby, yet at the same time I was extremely nervous.  I still am, a little.  Not nearly as much after our ultrasound, but understandably I have a teeeeeeny bit of fear.   But how can you pray for something and worry about it at the same time?  You can't.  And so I am working on putting my "dukes" down.  I refuse to go through the next 6 months in a vulnerable state.  Fear will creep in.  I am sure of it.  But I am determined to remember Who has been in charge this whole time.  NOT ME.  God gave us an amazing child in Autumn.  Why would I doubt that He would bless us with another healthy baby?  But IF HE DOES NOT, my faith will not be moved.  I will continue to love Him and trust Him.  I wouldn't do a single thing different if we could do Carina's pregnancy and delivery all over again, so for that reason alone I put my "dukes" down.  He carried me then, He will carry me now.  

I don't know what tomorrow holds, or the next few months, or the next few years.  But I do know that it will be okay.  I will be okay.  I choose to be excited!  I choose joy!  I stare at the scary unknown and laugh HA HA HA!!! (and I give it the evil eye every mom is famous for.) 

I love this baby and I love the One who created him or her.  I will not be moved.